Mustard comedy magazine: Issue #05a
Mustard issue 05a doodle

Issue #05a

Editorial

Mustard Lee & Herring Editorial

- Alex
 

This issue's Evil Corporate Sponsor
Soma
This issue's Obligatory Movie Quote
"We lost the band!"

In this issue:

 

Satirical News & Articles

#MustardNews
Richard Pryor in The Good Life

Richard Pryor in The Good Life

Great Casting Mistakes in History

Creators of Vanity Mirror launch Gluttony Fridge

Gluttony Fridge

From the creators of the Vanity Mirror

Local stadium is secret space ark

Local stadium is secret space ark

Escape apocalypse in government spaceship

World's first clay pigeon bred in captivity

World's first clay pigeon bred in captivity
Richmond destroyed by pasta-antipasta explosion

Pasta-antipasta explosion

Richmond completely vaporised

Obituary of a hedgerowsexual

Obituary of a hedgerowsexual

D. E. Obituary died in a flowerbed

Recession hits Tyrell corp

Recession hits Tyrell Corp

New models have boggly eyes and nylon hair

Movie Title Recycle

Movie titles recycled

Studio to re-use famous film titles

Matt Berry's Albums That Changed My Life

Matt Berry's Albums That Changed My Life

#5: London, Quakermass 1979

Comic Strips

#ComicStrips
Reservoir Nuns

Reservoir Nuns

Let's go to church

Muffin the Drugs Mule

Muffin the Drugs Mule

A fun trip to Columbia

I Married a Zombie

I Married a Zombie

Braaaaaaaaaains!

Stories & Characters

#Stories&Characters
Derring Dos & Don'ts: #5: The Poor

Derring Dos & Don'ts
pt.5: Poor

"Sponge off your relatives: I've wrung my folks, in strict rotation, 'til they squeaked."

Writer's Block: Whatever Happened To Your Bright Eyes, Johnny?

Writer's Block
#5: Whatever Happened To Your Bright Eyes, Johnny?

"On your toes, soldier!"

Skinny & Nod

Skinny & Nod
#5: Bag

"There's a good case for locking up anyone normal looking."

Infographics & Adverts

#Infographics&Ads
Carpe PM: Sieze the Afternoon

Carpe PM

Sieze the Afternoon

Your House From Space

Your House From Space

A photograph to treasure

101 Empty Platitudes

101 Empty Platitudes

A banal cliché for every occasion

Movie Posters & Mag Covers

#Movies&Mags
Turner and Hooch

Turner & Hooch
12 Angry Men

12 Angry Men
Angry Loner Monthly

Angry Loner Monthly
Vague magazine

Vague

One-Panel Cartoons

#RobotDad
Robot Dad v Travel Cot

J.B.

Robot Dad: Downtime

J.B.

Robot Dad: Company Car

J.B.

#Overheard
Overheard: Gabriel, put down that trident!

A.M. / H.S

Overheard: Lilly Allen offered me a joint and I said no. I'm really growing up.

A.M. / H.S

Overheard: Different? Getting a sex change is just weird

A.M. / H.S

Interview

#Interviews
Stewart Lee caricature

Stewart Lee

I don't want my career to be a smash-and-grab raid.
I'm in this for the long haul.

The comedian, writer and director talks stand-up, TV shows, Jerry Springer The Opera and being 'the comedian's comedian'.
10,000 words

Paper People

#PaperPeople
Paper People: Stewart Lee

Stewart Lee Paper Person

Cut-out-and-make comedian.

Cult Corner

#Profiles&Reviews
Alan Moore on Jack Trevor Storey

Cult Corner: Jack Trevor Storey

Alan Moore waxes lyrical on the author of The Trouble With Harry.

True Stories

#TrueStories
The Most Pain I've Ever Been In

The Most Pain I've Ever Been In

#1: Face: Off

"I could see my ear next to my shoulder."

#2: A swell time

"Tears spurt vertically from my eyes."

Letters Page

#LettersPage
Letters Page

Letters Page: Issue #05a

"The most middle class thing I've ever read."

Covers & Posters

#MustardPosters
Stewart Lee Mustard cover

Stewart Lee
Mustard cover
Colonel Mustard: Victorian Superhero

Colonel Mustard:
Victorian Superhero

 

 

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Mustard #05a

All text and images are © their respective authors.

Cover: Doodle version by A.W.
Real version: Stewart Lee photo © Steve Ullathorne

Thanks: Isabel Hopwood, Warren Ayling, Alex Ashworth, Guy Cuthbertson, Val Stevenson,
James Sherwood, Lindsey Clarke, Peter More, Pamela Norris, Kevin O'Neill.

This issue is dedicated to everyone born on September 12th 2010.

Footer gags: TOP TEN SEQUELS:
Troy 2: Must Troy Harder · Withnail and II · Ei8ht · Saw VIII: Really Saw · The Wine of Wrath · The Searchers II: Oh, wait, here it is · Taken 2: The Cleaners · Care Home Alone · Thelma & Louise II: Secret Parachutes · Bring Me the Rest of Alfredo Garcia · XI Men · The Postgraduate · Beverly Hills Security Guard

More issues »

The Complete Mustard

Mustard comedy magazine compendium
Mustard comedy magazine

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PDF  ยท  Paperback

The complete 336-page collection of all 9¼ issues,
featuring new and updated funny stuff, plus expanded interviews.

 

Myth Management

Out now: Mustard's first spin-off novel

Myth Management: a Young Adult Urban Fantasy novel by Alex Musson
Myth Management: a Young Adult Urban Fantasy novel by Alex Musson

Paperback  £8.99   Amazon.co.uk  ·  Amazon.com

Kindle  £2.99   Amazon.co.uk  ·  Amazon.com

 

Monkey at a typewriter
Mustard comedy magazine was founded and published by © Alex Musson
Illustrations © Simon Cooper, Andrew Waugh and others
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